WHO AM I?

Who am I?

Do you see a Pilot in smart uniform?

Do you see an Air Force Officer?

Do you see a Husband?

Do you see a Father?

Am I a Son?

Am I a Brother?

Do you see a Classmate?

Do you see a Course mate?

Do you see a friend?

Finally who am I?

I am Spirit I am Spirit

I am a Soul

Shining star on the Altar of God

Ever bright

Never born

And will never fade away

Testing the Efficiency of a Sacred Mantra

Testing the Efficiency of a Sacred Mantra

The Master at Guwahati had blessed me with a sacred protective mantra. He had vouched that no harm could ever touch me if I remembered and uttered this  sacred mantra at the time of crisis. I accepted the divine bounty with implicit faith. I had witnessed many a wonder in the presence of the Master so I knew what he said could never be false.

Many months later I was on the Howrah Mail from Chennai to Kolkata. The train was crowded. I had managed only a second class sleeper ticket. The oppressive heat and crowds created a madness. There was a Bengali family consisting of a couple and two young girls. I was travelling alone. There were two other men in their twenties travelling with a larger group sharing our berths. These men were loud and their friends joined them from the next berth. They kept up their noise and occasional lecherous remarks aimed at the young girls or the mother. After a few times of this objectionable conduct I told these guys that it was not acceptable.

The couple got worried and told me not to exacerbate the situation. The hours rolled on I spent many hours in silent meditation and ignored my fellow travelers. As evening approached I noted that the vulgar comments were increasing. May be this group was secretly consuming liquor. I was getting really irritated. I approached the TTI and complained to him. He was an old middle aged gentleman who wanted his peace. He just nodded and told me not to worry. I noted the there was another group of Bengali tourists in the adjoining berth and they too were irritated and annoyed with  rowdy conduct.

Loud words were exchanged. The family next to me was getting very scared. They repeatedly told me don’t get involved. We fear for our daughters. They are so many. The turn of events was sudden. Fist cuffs and blows were being exchanged. The objectors were out numbered. The oppressors seemed to being have their way. The Bengali lady was screaming out of fear. The Secret Mantra flashed into my consciousness. I knew I need not fear anything as promised by the Guwahati Master. I sprang up from my seat and rushed towards the leader of the gang. The Divine Mantra  ringing in my inner ear. I grabbed the man by his shirt. My voice let out loud warning. “STOP THIS NONSENSE.” This sudden shout destabilised the group. Now in a calm voice I commanded every one to stop the fight. Both groups were agitated and wanted to settle scores. I told the group leader “Your boys have been misbehaving and have not listened to reason.” My voice was loud and commanding. The Sacred Mantra still reverberating in my head.

A flash of Divine Energy touched both the Waring groups. A sudden calm enveloped the compartment. Both groups were apologetic and saying sorry. The leader told me sir let us have some juice it will cool us all. Just then the train stopped at a station. I said, “Yes that is a great idea.” I offered to pay for the soft drinks but was denied the privilege. The mood in the compartment turned festive with old foes sharing soft drinks and food.

The dramatic turn of events shook every one. Even the TTI came on to the scene and told me, “See I told you things will pass.” The Bengali mother was thanking me profusely and told me. “Aap ne kuch jadoo kiya.”

In my mind I was on my knees thanking God and the Master from Guwahati, who can’t be named, for having vouchsafed the efficacy of the Sacred Mantra in such a dramatic way.

Mehrauli Satsang with Guru Maharaj

At the crack of dawn I started off from Palam for the Satsang of Guru Maharaj. I had received only vague directions from Shankar when I had witnessed the divine light on the Grand Trunk Express. I only remembered Mehrauli being mentioned. In the 80s Mehrauli was a sleepy village. I rode along on the dusty and pot holed track on my scooter.  It was almost 9 AM and I was fast losing hope of finding the Satsang.

I turned a corner and the atmosphere changed dramatically. There were crowds on the road and the decorations hinted at a festival. Hundreds of buses, trucks, cars and scooters were parked every where. Volunteers at each gate formed welcome committees. I was questioned deeply. Are you an Abhyasi?  Have you been initiated by the Guru. Oh! This is your first visit. I clarified that I was just a visitor. A small metal badge was pinned to my shirt. There were arrangements for thousands of devotees to stay. Vast tents and hangar like structures had been erected on large grounds. Free literature, coloured photos similar to the one that I had seen on the train were freely handed over to all. I looked at each photo and tried to see if any divine glow emanated from them. Alas they appeared just ordinary photos. I was directed to the giant dining hall where breakfast was being served. Nothing had prepared me for the vast crowds. I had imagined that I would walk directly in to the divine presence of the Guru and have his darshan. I was disappointed to learn that darshan was only in the evening. Breakfast consisted of unlimited hot puris and allu subji. Hundreds of volunteers helped in preparation and serving the thronging devotees. I wandered about the grounds. The large crowds of village folk with their loud talk and shabby appearance was a total put off for me. I had imagined something totally different. I found a hall that had a garish exhibition describing the spiritual activities and and the growth of the organisation. I asked if there was any meditation hall. I was overjoyed to note that a giant hall had been set aside just for the purpose. I had noticed that most devotees had some sort of identity card pinned to their shirt. Mine was just for visitors.

I walked around the grounds trying to find the meditation centre. I asked the volunteers about the meditation hall. But got no positive response. They just took one look at me and my badge and didn't reply. My frustration was deepening, no darshan and no meditation. Just at that moment I noticed a longish queue in front of a massive tent. A sudden thrill ran down my body to learn that it was for meditation. I silently joined the line.  Entrance was being controlled by a swami who was checking the card of each person. I just prayed that I may be allowed inside. Many were being refused entry. The questions were standard are you an Abhyasi. Have you been initiated by the master. Where is your ID card? I knew I would never tell a lie to enter. My turn arrived, the swami asked me “where is your ID card?” I replied honestly I don't have one. Have you been initiated by the master? No.  Surprise of surprise he didn't shoo me away as he had done the others without the credentials. He told me to stand aside. Other devotees continued on to the meditation hall. I was lost in prayer. Mixed emotions fleetingly passed my mind. A wasted day. My foolishness in standing in the queue when I knew admission was limited to the initiated. A silence enveloped me and a sudden energy touched me. At that very instant I looked towards the swami. I knew that same divine energy had nudged him. His face brightened and he gestured to me to step forward. I was a bit confused but he held my arm and said you may enter. I felt I was being mistaken for some one else. So I said in Hindi I have not been initiated. He just said again you may enter.

The meditation tent could easily accommodate ten thousand meditators. Many swamis in white or saffron robes were moving around instructing the meditators to sit down keeping sufficient space between each person.  There was a chief swami who was giving instruction on a mike and the whole group was taking up various asanas I was a bit lost as I didn't follow any instruction. A sudden fear gripped my heart. Would I be hauled up as an imposter and expelled from the hall. Should I imitate my neighbours? A silent voice told my heart just sit and meditate as you do every day. I just closed my eyes and went into my own heart. Meditation continued for more than three quarters of an hour. Though I did my own stuff. I gained an insight into what my companions were being guided. They were attempting to hear the inner sound of the universal heart.  In the Deep calm that my meditation had settled was a hint and flashes of images that were memories beyond the present.  I got an insight into why I had been permitted to attend. When the session ended I opened my eyes and looked calmly around and noticed that many swamis had been moving around and correcting and helping my companions but no one had ever told me anything.

 The meditation boosted my energy and my resolve to stay till the evening Satang and have a darshan of the Guru Maharaj. It was now almost lunch time and all were being directed towards the large dining tents. I too joined in and was treated to a tasty meal made with love and served by the volunteers. It was like a carnival. The simple village folk mixed with the elite city dwellers in their devotion to the Guru Maharaj. The curse of caste and class that divides India vanished temporarily. Both body and soul refreshed I decided to do some voluntary work. I enquired and moved to the site of the evening Satsang. I joined the large groups helping to decorate the stage and the grounds. I forgot my self and worked for hours on end.  Every thirty minutes volunteers brought water and tea or biscuits for us and lovingly coaxed us to take the Prasad.

 Slowly my companions started to leave to rejoin family members and freshen up for the evening Satsang. I noticed that the grounds had been closed out and devotees wanting to enter early were not being allowed. The gates would be opened only at seven in the evening. I enquired with a middle aged swami where I should sit for darshan.  He lead me straight on to the sofas kept on the very first row and said take rest you will surely get the best darshan here. The day had been long and I had done hours of physical labour so the suggestion was welcome but the very first row!! I couldn't believe it. I felt a bit uncomfortable and moved to the sofa on the second row. The minute I sat down a cool breeze relaxed me. I was in a deep restful sleep. I was woken up by the loud blast of devotional music that announced the entry of devotees. The ground had been barricaded I looked back and saw the mass of devotees thronging the grounds. Thousands were vying to get in. I looked at my own position and was more than shocked. I seemed to be in the VIP enclosure. What was my merit that had led me to this privilege? Or what was my connection that had led me on?

The evening programme started with bhajans and devotional songs. The simple village folk seemed out of key but deep devotion and love swayed the mass of devotees. The Great Guru Maharaj stepped onstage to a thunderous applause. He was dressed in his signature blue suit. The master started leading the bhajan in a simple and quite voice. He had a hypnotic presence. Many children, young boys and girls started dancing. Then very old women joined in. The atmosphere was enchanting. The whole satsung was vibrating at a higher spiritual level. Many participants were swooning unable to handle this sudden downpour of energy. My own body was shivering trying to adjust to this new energy. The Master stepped off the stage and moved swiftly inside the VIP area Blessing all those present. I stepped out and did a sastang namaskar. The master dropped a flower. I was overwhelmed. Tears of joy were freely flowing down my cheeks.  As I got back to my seat I noticed the time it was already passed 10 PM.

I never met Shankar that evening. Two months later on a visit to Bangalore I saw Shankar again and narrated my experiences of the Mehrauli Satsang.  Shankar refused to believe that I could have participated in the meditation. He asked me repeatedly. What did you tell the Swami? Non Abyasis are never allowed. It's not possible.  I just repeated my narrative.  “You sat in the VIP enclosure and The Guru Maharaj gave you a flower!” Shankar was astounded by my tale. He bowed his head and was touching my feet in deep reverence. You must be divinely connected to the great Guru. I couldn’t comprehend his behaviour and just hugged him as a brother devotee.

This visit to Mehrauli showed me the deep and selfless love of the simple village folk of rural India and its spiritual possibilities. Thank You Guru Maharaj for blessing a wanderer.

The Battle of Ghosts in a Kolkata Hotel

On a flight to Kolkata my colleague Shakti asked me “Sir have you stayed at this hotel at Kolkata where the company has booked our rooms.” I said, “No. But why? Anything interesting?” “Oh Sir it’s a crazy hotel. I am very scared of staying there.” I asked him to elaborate. He described how many other colleagues had been affected by the haunted rooms there. I listened to his incredulous story and promised to investigate the same during our stay there.

During the long drive from the airport to the hotel I had put myself into a receptive state.  I gained much information about the haunted zones in the hotel. I joked with the hotel staff and told them “Please allot one of those special rooms to me.” The staff were shocked but tight lipped. Just then I noticed Shakti becoming pale. I asked “Hey what is the problem?” He said, “They have allotted the same room again. I can’t stay there.”

I immediately told the check in staff, “Please interchange the rooms and I will take that room.”  They said, “Why Sir? Both room are very good.” I just insisted and got the rooms changed. Shakti was hyperventilating worried for me he said, “Sir Ji be careful I never slept the whole night on my last stay here it’s really bad.”

I told him don’t worry about me. I remembered the special protective mantra I had received from the Master in Guwahati. I was confident no ghost could ever frighten me.

That evening I strolled casually in the various corridors of that 5 star hotel feeling the different energies. I noted how a whole section of the hotel had been closed off and a wall had been constructed blocking access to that area. My room was the last one. I noticed the green flag of a Muslim Saint placed on the roof as a protective talisman. The corridors had burning lamps combined with fragrant oils as room fresheners. It suggested of precautions taken by the hotel management to ward off evil influences.

I had an early dinner. During my evening meditation and prayers I included a special prayer for the welfare of the tormented souls stuck in the hotel. I went to bed early anticipating a late night vigil. I had a sound dreamless sleep. I woke up due to slight disturbance at about 2 AM. I washed my face and sat on the bed to go into a deep state. Within minutes a curious ancient scene unfolded in my inner vision. It was a Military Hospital many injured soldiers were in terrible pain. Pain killers not being in much supply. Some soldiers opting suicide to end their painful existence. Many re-living the torment of the battle field. A deep sense of sorrow descended on my heart as I felt their pain. I noticed some of these tortured beings approach me. I send deep waves of blessings and prayers which they seemed to feel and acknowledge. I told them my purpose was to help. This joyful communion was becoming deeper. They believed my honesty and sincerity. They told me their painful stories. I can’t breech that sacred trust and reveal it here. Much like a doctor can’t reveal his patients ailments in public.

Just as things were progressing much beyond my expectations. The peace was violently disturbed by a horde of ancient soldiers. They burst on to scene with their weapons and armor. The new comers positioned themselves in between. A deep anger rose in my heart at this flagrant violation of my privacy. I expressed the same to the leader of the horde. He was calm and commanded my attention. “Sir we watched the scene as it had unfolded from outside the room. Your communion with the disembodied. Your words of encouragement and hope. We too trust you and believe you. But we have a duty to perform”.

I was not convinced and I conveyed my irritation at being so rudely disturbed. The leader of the horde addressed me again. We have been positioned here to protect the hotel guests so we need to perform our duty. We can’t watch this strange interaction between you and the disembodied ones. It is our duty to protect you and prevent this interaction.

I saw the logic and felt pacified. The strange scene melted into the infinity from where it had emerged. There was peace just a light glow in my inner vision. I opened my eyes and saw the room was exactly as it had been. I prayed again for both groups trapped by their fates. May God bless and save them. 

I went back to bed and had a restful sleep. Next morning Shakti was all keen to know if I had discovered anything. I told him a short synopsis of the events of the previous night. His eyes dilated in fear “Sir is it really true. I will never accept a stay at this hotel. The company needs to change our hotel.”

I knew this was not my last stay at this hotel. Many new adventures lay in wait in the haunted corridors and rooms.

-

Vision of Parents in Chennai with a Divine Being in Guwahati

It was late in the evening. The sun had set long back. I rode my trusted Chetak on the dark roads of rural Guwahati. I was visiting my teacher at “VIP Moude”. I had been a frequent visitor and was invited lovingly into their living room. My teacher’s daughter brought the customary glass of water and left. I was waiting patiently for the master to appear. He walked in quietly. I got up to pranam. He asked me to sit on the sofa and selected a wooden chair for himself. He looked lovingly at me and enquired about my welfare. 

After a few minutes of silence he requested me to meditate sitting right there. The peace was deep and my entire body was tingling with joy. Just then he asked me, “Do you see my friend who has just arrived.” Before I could open my eyes to greet the visitor, the master suggested that I go deeper into the inner light. With my eyes tightly shut I tried to increase my concentration but nothing crossed my inner vision. I just nodded and mumbled “kuch nahin”. Then I heard the master laugh and tell the visitor, “He doesn’t see you yet.” I didn’t hear the reply, the master was now beside me and he just tapped my back and said in Hindi “Theeq se dekho”.  Wow! the inner light was dazzling.  In the vision was a divine being of light. In my mind I asked “who is this?” My thought was answered instantly by the master in the form of thought capsules. “He is my friend he can give you a vision of any place that you want”. I just remembered my parents in Chennai. The very thought transformed the inner vision. I was seeing my mother at our family house sitting in front of the TV. Father too was visible as he was moving from the drawing room to the bed room and back. The vision was clear but as seen through a morning mist. The audio was missing and just the video running. I was in a telepathic communion with my parents. I was engrossed in the inner magic and enjoying the divine blessings. The master just tapped my back a second time and said, “Maja ayah. Mataji aur Pitaji acchen hain.” I had said nothing but words seemed superficial.

Now I opened my eyes and replied, “Yes, they seem fine. A bit lonely though”. I blinked my eyes and closed again this time the divine visitor was clearly visible to my inner sight without the master’s prompting.

I immediately got down to pranam and pay obeisance to the master for the gift of the inner vision. I felt the other leave with a blessing and a message. “Good Bye Brother till we will meet again.” I did encounter this divine being again but that is a different story

The master fondly picked me up and gave certain instructions for my spiritual growth. It was already late. I rode back along the lonely road to my home with my mind spinning. The divine experience and events of the evening could not have been a dream.

Trial Landing at Puttaparthi

There was a quiet excitement in the squadron. A VIP flight to a new destination. The President  of India  wanted to visit Sai Baba at Puttaparthi  and have his blessing.. Satya Sai Baba was a famous Saint, a living God for his followers. His Ashram is at Puttaparthi a small village  in Andhra Pradesh State in Southern India. Sai baba had millions of disciples which included Heads of States and Kings. I had visited Puttaparthi earlier in 1987 as part of a pilgrimage just after my marriage.  My friend and room mate in Trivandrum had a deep connection with Sai Baba and Puttaparthi. He had told me many wonderous tales of Sai Baba and Puttaparthi.  Puttaparthi lies directly on the flight path from Bangalore to Hyderabad and we had seen the Ashram  many times from the air.

I wanted to renew this connection to Sai Baba and Puttaparthi  so wished to do the flight.

A roster was maintained in the squadron  for all VIP flights so that these flights are equally done by all the posted crew. I checked the list and noted that I didn't figure in the top. I wanted to go to Puttaparthi and quietly prayed that I should be nominated for the flight. Just before pack up time the flight Commander asked to see me. Normally that meant some trouble I started worrying. Then a sudden thrill passed my body and I knew that this was different. I saluted and walked into the office. The flight commander continued his work and casually asked me,’Do  you know where is Puttaparthi?' I told him I had visited Puttaparthi by road and had seen the Ashram from the air. ‘Oh that's  great you have done ground and air recce.’  ‘Why don't you go and do a trail landing.’ I couldn't believe my ears. My silent prayer had been almost instantly answered.   ‘Tomorrow  please do all the planning and trail landing can be two days later.’  I just remained silent and thanked  Sai Baba. It was a strong held believe in india that no man can visit a holy place unless the deity there calls. So this was surely Sai Baba calling me. 

My neighbour and good friend Chandru was to be my my co pilot for this flight. Puttaparthi is surrounded by hills and the Chitravati River  flowed nearby. Since it was a newly constructed runway it wasn't marked on our maps. We studied the maps for obstacles and hill features. We spent some time doing a detailed analysis of landing and take off performance.

 It was a bright and sunny day in Delhi when we took off for Puttaparthi. The longish flight took us past Agra, Bhopal, Nagpur and Hyderabad. We commenced descent and reached over head Puttaparthi. We carried out a visual circuit a low pass and a go around. On the second approach we landed on the newly constructed runway.  The first by a large Air Force aeroplane. The main wheel touched down smoothly. Then I lowered the nose wheel gently on to the runway and called  for propeller braking and started squeezing the toe brakes. The Avro rapidly decelerated. On the landing roll a thought passed my mind and said it aloud. ‘I think half the runway should have been good enough.’Puttaparthi runway at that time was about 4000 feet long.

 The ATC controller was keen to have an immediate debrief. We transmitted that we would come to the control tower a give a detailed report. We taxied to the apron and shutdown the aircraft. The ATC controller said he would come down to meet us.

The ATC officer walked briskly towards us and was appearing to be vey excited. He was the first to talk. In an animated voice he told us,’I  just informed Sai Baba that the Air Force aircraft has landed.’ What he said next was like a bolt out of the sky and took us straight out to another dimension. The ATC officer continued and said Sai Baba had just told him that the trail was successful and the pilot had informed Sai baba that half the runway should be sufficient. My copilot Chandru, the navigator and I were stupefied and confused. We looked at each other's face for an explanation. We couldn't comprehend what was happening. We asked the ATC officer again. ‘ What are you saying? Can you explain.’ The ATC officer repeated his message. ‘I spoke to Sai Baba as soon as your aircraft landed to inform him about the same. I told Baba that the aircraft has landed and the  pilot will give a detailed report. At that point Sai baba had told him don't worry the trail landing was successful and the pilot has already informed him that half the runway length would have been good enough.’

How did Sai baba hear what we had spoken in the cockpit. As children we had learnt that God watches over our every deed and word. Millions of Sai babas disciples believe that Sai baba is God on earth and here we had seen a clear demonstration of that Divine  power.

Chandru fought a valiant battle against cancer and recently  passed on into the brighter world. As cherished memories of a dear friend shoot past my mind this singular event signalling a deeper divine connection jumped into my consciousness. Farewell dear friend till we meet again.

Flood of Spiritual Energy on an Indian Train

The Tamil Nadu Express was chugging its way to New Delhi on a hot summer afternoon. The vestibuled train was useful  for long walks to stretch ones body and to kill the boredom of sitting many hours in a single seat. I stepped out of the ac compartment. The train was crowded, full of families with children returning from the annual summer holidays. There were many vendors selling their wares. The odd book seller. The guy selling a pack of sewing needles or cheap ball point pens added to the interest of curious passengers who had to bear brunt of a two day journey to Delhi. I wound my way to the rear of the train. Stopping once in a while to hear out the vendors extolling their wares. The atmosphere dramatically changed as I entered the last reserved compartment. A sudden calm and a cool breeze. A flood of energy made my body tingle. I looked keenly at every passenger but found nothing. Just a motley mix of middle class families with children, older couples, a few business men and some students. My curiosity had been triggered. I was determined to find the source of this spiritual radiation in second class Indian train.

I returned to my own seat and meditated for some time.   No message passed my inner eye. Towards evening I made my way again to the last compartment. This time again I noticed the sudden surge of spiritual energy. As I scanned the compartment a sudden flash of light blinded my inner eye. My attention was drawn to a young man reading a book. The picture of a middle aged person in a blue two piece suit kept as a book mark was enveloped in an etheric light. The light beckoned my soul and I moved silently to wards the young man. There were no introductions. I directly asked the youngster. ‘Is this your Master’s photo?’ The man was startled by this direct question and took a few seconds to comprehend the question. Then the flood gates of joy poured out. ‘Yes this is Guru Maharaj. My most beloved Master. But how did  you guess? Most people are deceived by Masters Western attire. Have you heard of Guru Maharaj or have you seen his picture before? I remained silent and just tried to soak in the the profound energy that is pure love. I just nodded my head and said this was first time I had seen or heard of Guru Maharaj. I said nothing of the light or the flood of spiritual energy that I had experienced.. Shankar told me that he was a research scholar at IISc and was travelling to Delhi for an interview. He confided that the actual purpose of his Delhi trip was to have darshan of his Master. I just told Shankar that I worked in the armed forces and was posted in Delhi. Shankar insisted that I attend the mega satang planned at Mehrauli. He gave complete details. We exchanged addresses and contact details. Shankar spoke eloquently about his Master. He invited me to his hostel should I ever pass through Bangalore.

   I returned to my seat and spent the rest of train journey trying to fathom the meaning of the incidents of the day. I was attracted by Shankar’s deep faith. I knew I would surely meet him again. I silently resolved to have at least a darshan of Guru Maharaj at Mehrauli.